Parents can never get tired of expressing their love to their children. We are driven by our constant need to make them feel loved. Often it leads to loss of discipline in them and we eventually spoil them. As parents and adult it is very important for us to see things from our kid’s perspective and show consideration towards them. It requires a lot of work and energy.
A large amount of work goes into taking care of another human being, yet when we are truly present with our little one, we frequently see that it simply makes us feel more alive than being completely present with anybody does. Often you might have head parents say when they get older that they wish they had spent more time with their child especially when they were young. But how could it be possible when as responsible parents we are in a constant fight of survival in life keep us too busy. Well it requires very little efforts to pay attention to them while performing other tasks.
Well to make it more clear let me tell you what exactly you need to do to build the real bond with your child.
1. Make you child your priority
Accept the fact that you will have to put in a lot of time in building that bind. Spending quality time will not always be possible and there is no switch to turn on the process of bonding. It takes its own course of time. Even when you meet your closest friend they also don’t quickly begin uncovering their inner self. Then how can we expect our kid to. In relationships, without quantity, there’s no quality. If we spend all our time in work and them with their friends then, how can it be possible? So as hard as it seems with the pressures of job and daily life, if we want a better relationship with our kids, we have to free up the time to make that happen.
2. Build Sense of Trust
At a very early age a child learns to depend on when to do things for him when in need. Over a period of time we keep instilling this trust through showing our confidence in them and keeping our promises etc. Building trust with them is to ensure them that no matter what happens you will be by their side to support them.
3. Make Communication easy
Communication is key to creating a strong bond with your child. It’s important that they feel like they can talk to you about anything and feel safe. They need to believe that they have a trusted ear who will listen patiently and not react in anger on their faults. Listen very carefully when they are communicating with you and give value to their thought which will help you in guiding them in the right direction. It is necessary to control your reactions for your child to keep looking at you as a trusted source.
4. Surprise them often
Everyone expects to be pampered by their loved ones and so does your little one. He is looking out for all love and care and is waiting for moments when you as parents would surprise him. So, to make your child feel happy and show him that you know what he likes, you should undoubtedly get surprise gifts sometimes for your child. The surprise could be small chocolate to an outing ticket to an amusement park; make sure you do all of it.
5. Energize them with constant Encouragement
Your encouragement makes them feel recognized and capable of doing great things. The only assurance they look upon you is to know that you are on their side. If most of what comes out of your mouth is correction or criticism, they won’t feel good about themselves, and they won’t feel like you’re their ally. You lose your only leverage with them, and they lose something every kid needs: to know they have an adult who thinks the world of them.
6. Create a space of Mutual Respect
It doesn’t matter how young your kid may be you should always strive to build the bond on the grounds of mutual respect. Rather than feeling challenged on your authority the expectation of being treated with dignity comes very early in kids. You would often see them telling you to be polite or show their dislike towards your angry or blunt responses. Don’t we all chose people in life who we treat respectfully and get the same in return. So, we need to create that atmosphere where your kids feels respected and he will give it the same in return.
7. Join their hobbies
It is important for parents to know what your kid likes to do and join them in it. Doing what they like to do with them will give them encouragement and the feeling of security which will pave the way for developing god relation with them. With this not only the bond will become better but also you will be able to find out but you will be able to nurture them in the right direction of their interest and talent that they have.
8. Lead by Example
A child always look up to the behaviour of his parents and their personality becomes a major influence in shaping their personality too. If a child notices your good qualities and count on you as their role model, the chances of him getting more attached to you multiplies. However, if the child observes that you are an angry person or always keeps shouting, the child would be scared of you and would not likely get attached to you because of the fear factor. Thus, it is vital to show your right side and let the child set his career goals by getting influenced by you.
9. Avoid punitive behaviour
Isn’t it easy for us to just punish them for their bad behaviour thinking it will reinforce the right doing? Well sadly it doesn’t. You have to consider their point of view their mixed emotional feelings, immature behaviour and inability to understand and express their emotions better. So try not to feel the hurt or simply let it go and remind yourself the love you have for each other to deal with it calmly and constructively. They would need our guidance on every step of their life but if in order to teach them we start punishing them for their mistakes, it will simply instil the fear factor and the bond will begin eroding. So remember that every difficulty is an opportunity to get closer or create distance. Choose wisely.
10. Turn off the Technology
To make your bond solid and cause the youngster to understand that connections are more esteemed than anything, ensure you switch off the innovation when you invest energy with him. It should not be a training from your side, yet you can request that your youngster do this. We all enjoy the benefits of technology, however at that point, sooner or later, we do experience inconveniences as well. So ensure you and your kid both dispose of online media and different means of technology when you both are together.
By being a sensitive and responsive parent you are likely to reduce their troublesome behaviours, and build a warm, caring parent-child relationship. Remember never weigh yourself on scale that you may be not a good parent because no matter what, you will be the only one who will always think of their interest first. You are the best judge of your bond with your child and don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise. Take it as a burden free and enjoyable journey of love together.